Dec. 31st, 2009

satoshi_pallas: (isaac)
MY ACCOUNT EXPIRED SO ALL MY ICONS DIED, NOOOO. All my Kyo Kara Maoh ones are a thing of the past now...

So everyone's been talking about the decade ending and stuff! At first I was like "who the hell cares, time is only something people choose to put value on," and I still agree with that, but I got to thinking about how much has really changed in the past ten years.
--My best friend and I still had a plan where we would go to Eastlake High School together and then go on to the UW. We'd be roommates and then always stay in touch with each other. But by 2001 I'd decided to go to UCLA to become a director/screenwriter (LOL PAST SELF SORRY), and she didn't end up going to the UW anyway, and today we're not even in contact.
--I wore tie-dye then. The horror.
--I wore Nike boys shoes because it was the only way I figured I could cross-dress.
--I had recently created characters called Akira Anonymous and Ryoga Hawkins. (Those. Names.) Obviously by this point I no longer write stories with them, of course! I mean, why would I.
--I was obsessed with Japan in general and gave everything Japanese-sounding names. In fifth grade I primarily wrote a story called "No Reason to Live" (WHAT A GOOD EMO KID I WAS) centering on brothers named Akira and Tenchi Matsuda whose friend/girlfriend Makota had gone missing. I reread it recently; it is a TERRIBLE story with terrible dialogue and terrible plot twists. A bunch of girls in my class read it back then and loved it. Go figure.
--I loved anime, but obviously the only stuff I was able to watch at the time was Sailor Moon, Pokemon, Dragon Ball Z, and Tenchi Muyo. I also loved manga but only could read Takahashi stuff.
--I didn't know who CLAMP was but loved Rayearth and was freaked out by X/1999.
--I thought I was totally superior to everyone else. I still do think I'm the most awesome person alive, but I can actually justify it now. Back then I was just full of myself and "above" everyone else, but I was only better academically.
--I often stood in 38 degree weather in short sleeves in the rain because I was training to be okay in cold weather because my parents said we would go on an Alaskan cruise.
--...Basically I was totally different only really pretty much the same only not as much of a jerk. Well. I didn't realize I was being a jerk then, and that's what matters.

Ten years ago on New Year's Eve, my parents and I watched Yellow Submarine. Then they watched some movie downstairs when I went upstairs and secretly watched a South Park marathon. (They didn't let me watch it then.) I found the show quite vulgar and really didn't like it, but I made myself watch an episode anyway. Then they came up in enough time for midnight. Whatever news station we were watching showed how other parts of the world were celebrating New Year's. Las Vegas came onto the screen, and my mom said, "That looks like a nice place to live." Right then I got a terrible feeling in my stomach, and I knew we'd be moving here.

Sometimes I wonder how I'd have turned out if we'd stayed in Washington, but it's pointless to think about. We wouldn't have been able to afford it, and by sixth grade there I was burning out quickly, so I think I wouldn't have ended up nearly as happy/fulfilled/amazing as I am now. I grew up a lot in the last ten years and acquired many skills, so hopefully in the next ten years I'll be able to stand on my own two feet and proudly alert the world to my presence.


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